The Dunces of April: The Month's Most Foolish Politicians and Pundits
Orgies, Presidential Obfuscation, Hypocritical Congressmen and UN Ineffectiveness
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My monthly search for unintelligent life in the American political class is mostly an editing mission because so many of our politicians and pundits work hard to make the list. This month, though, an undisputed winner broke through and probably deserved a whole article on his own.
Cocaine, Orgies, and Loaded Guns at Airports
I never thought I’d write a subtitle like that to describe a member of Congress, but the youngest U.S. representative is making a powerful case for raising the age of eligibility.
26-year-old Congressman Madison Cawthorn ended April facing calls for ethics investigations into a wide range of misbehavior.
On Tuesday, April 26, Cawthorn was caught trying to take a loaded gun through security at Charlotte Douglas International Airport. Not only is it the second time he’s been stopped for carrying a loaded handgun onto a commercial flight, he’s also been accused four times of taking a knife onto school property.
Even a member of his own party, Republican Senator Thom Tillis, is calling for the House Ethics Committee to investigate Cawthorn for alleged insider trading.
Another complaint accuses him of financial and ethical improprieties with his scheduler, and a series of women have accused him of predatory behavior in his college years.
Along with others on the far right, he called Ukrainian President Volodomyr Zelensky “a thug” and Ukraine’s government “incredibly evil.” He did this in March, after Russia invaded Ukraine.
If all that weren’t enough, in late March, during an appearance on a podcast, Cawthorn seemed to claim that lawmakers invited him to an orgy in Washington and that he’s witnessed GOP colleagues doing cocaine. After a firestorm of criticism, Cawthorn now says he was exaggerating.
THE DUNCE RATING
For a staggering amount of stupid and likely illegal behavior, Cawthorn deserves:
Does Biden Not Remember What He Said About Inflation?
I’m sure you remember how President Biden kept telling us that inflation was “transitory.” Now, he wants us to believe that he’s “not concerned” about a recession in the immediate future. I hope he’s right, but the Commerce Department announced that the U.S. economy shrank 1.4% at the beginning of 2022, the worst quarter in two years.
Economists aren’t so sure. Reuters found 40% of 100 economists predict a recession over the next two years.
That comment is only one of the many questionable ones made by the president in April.
Biden has a long history of gaffes and confusion that goes back to when he was a young politician. Conservative media loves to highlight this, but the pundits often go overboard in their unwavering efforts to portray him as out of touch and mentally incompetent. However, in their defense, Biden is the leader of the free world, and attention must be paid.
In April, he appeared to confuse the Title 42 policy with the federal mask mandate for public transit. Title 42 is a public health emergency order that allows federal agents to turn away migrants at the U.S.-Mexico border, even those seeking asylum, to prevent the spread of COVID-19.
When Biden was asked whether he’s considering a delay in repealing Title 42, he answered as if he had been asked about the mask mandate on planes, which had been recently struck down by a judge. His answer made it seem that he had no idea what Title 42 was.
Earlier in the month, at the commissioning of the USS Delaware, the newest American nuclear attack submarine, the president appeared confused about who was vice president during the Obama administration.
Referring to his wife, Dr. Jill Biden, the president said: “I’m deeply proud of the work she is doing as First Lady with Joining Forces Initiative she started with Michelle Obama when she was Vice President and now carries on.”
Biden’s comments weren’t clear as to whether he thought Michelle Obama or Dr. Biden was President Obama’s vice president. Of course, he was the vice president during the Obama years.
THE DUNCE RATING
While neither of the gaffes amounts to much, Biden is holding a lot fewer news conferences than any president since Ronald Reagan, but he’s still accumulating verbal mistakes at an alarming rate, undermining presidential authority. Combine that with his unqualified dismissal of recession risks and Biden deserves:
No, No, NATO
For those of you who aren’t old like me, that subtitle is a reference to the Broadway musical “No, No, Nanette,” whose precursor play, “My Lady Friends,” was financed by the sale of Babe Ruth by the Boston Red Sox to the New York Yankees, which led to the “Curse of the Bambino.” But I digress.
Early this month, almost one-third of House Republicans voted against a non-binding resolution that reaffirmed "unequivocal support for the North Atlantic Treaty Organization (NATO) as an alliance founded on democratic principles.” It passed, 362-63, with all the nay votes coming from the GOP.
So, in the face of the Russian invasion of Ukraine, a moment in history when NATO has proven its relevance like at few other times since its creation, these Republicans refused to publicly support the alliance.
For perspective, in 2019, facing then President Trump’s ambivalence toward NATO, the Senate approved a motion to support the alliance by 97-2. That same year, the House passed the NATO Support Act with a 357-22 vote.
So, what gives? Some Republicans argued they didn’t like language in the new resolution that called for reaffirming “democratic principles,” enhancing democratic values in member, and the creation of a new “Center for Democratic Resilience.”
Give me a break.
The bottom line is that these Republicans were towing the Trump line and supporting absurd isolationism. Rep. Thomas Massie (R-Ky.) represented their position when he called NATO “a relic of the Cold War” and asked, “Why should Americans pay for Europe’s defense?”
It's an example of how the extremes touch. Left-wingers have come up with even crazier reasons for opposing NATO, as exemplified by an op-ed piece in the Washington Post titled “NATO was founded to protect ‘civilized’ people. That means White.”
THE DUNCE RATING
Because this minority group in Congress cares more about politics than world peace, they deserve:
The Ridiculous Rights Council
The UN General Assembly appropriately voted to suspend Russia from the international organization’s Human Rights Council in the wake of Russia’s invasion of Ukraine.
So, all’s good right?
Not a chance.
93 countries voted in favor of the resolution, 24 against, and 58 abstained.
To be clear: Russia illegally invaded Ukraine, a sovereign state and member of the UN, butchered thousands of Ukrainians in what UN Secretary General Antonio Guterres called “evil” acts, and 82 countries could not bring themselves to vote to expel Russia from a human rights council.
Delegates attend the opening of the 49th session of the United Nations Human Rights Council at the United Nations Office in Geneva, Switzerland, Feb. 28, 2022. The 49th session of the UNHRC held an emergency debate on the situation in Ukraine later that week. (Xinhua/Getty Images)
One could even ask why in the world Russia was on the UN Human Rights Council to begin with, given the Kremlin’s atrocious record on human rights, as detailed by Amnesty International.
That would assume that the UNHRC is a serious organization. It’s not.
For example, China is a member of the UNHRC despite standing accused of genocide against its Uyghur minority, and Amnesty International citing a litany of human rights abuses by the Chinese government.
Cuba, Venezuela, Pakistan, Eritrea, and Uzbekistan are other human rights violators who are members of the council.
Incredible, given that the UNHRC’s mission is to promote and protect human rights around the world.
THE DUNCE RATING
For the United Nations’ inability to get its house in order on one of its main missions, for the UNHRC’s pathetic record on human rights, and for those countries who couldn’t bring themselves to condemn Russia’s horrific aggression, they all deserve:
Time to Watch “I’m Just a Bill”
“The View’s” Joy Behar clearly never watched Schoolhouse Rock’s “I’m Just a Bill.” She should.
The bloviator said on April 13 that “the Supreme Court is poised to pass a bill” that would make New York an “open-carry state … for guns.”
Joy Behar (R) interviews then U.S. President Barack Obama along with Barbara Walters on the ABC daytime television talk show, "The View" in New York, July 28, 2010. (Saul Loeb/AFP/Getty Images)
Of course, as any middle-schooler who paid attention would know, Congress passes bills, not the Supreme Court.
To nobody’s surprise, Behar and “The View” have not corrected their constitutional mistake.
THE DUNCE RATING
This would normally rate just one dunce, but Behar loves to make fun of gaffes by those whom she does not like, so she deserves:
The Congressman Who Prefers to Fly Than Vote
The Honolulu Civil Beat reported in April that Rep. Kai Kahele (D-Hawaii) continues to work as a Hawaiian Airlines pilot, a job that paid him nearly $120,000 in 2020, according to his most recent House financial disclosure report.
On its face, that’s not a big deal, as long as Kahele followed House rules on outside employment. His congressional office claims he’s only flying a little to “maintain his certification.”
The problem is that Kahele finds time to fly, but not to show up for his job as a congressman. Various reports indicate that by mid-April he had been absent from Congress for most of 2022, only voting in person five times.
Rep. Kai Kahele (D-HI) in the National Statuary Hall on Capitol Hill on Thursday, April 28, 2022 in Washington, DC. (Kent Nishimura/Los Angeles Times/Getty Images)
Hey, if you lived in Hawaii, would you want to be in Washington during the winter?
I’m sure we all sympathize with Kai, but he was the one who got elected to Congress, not me or my readers.
Adding to his problems, when he ran for the job, he promised to show up, attacking his predecessor Tulsi Gabbard for running for president and ignoring their district. He promised he was different.
That’s enough for a bunch of dunces, right?
But I’m not finished yet.
The Honolulu Star Advertiser has confirmed that Kahele has decided to run for governor of Hawaii instead of running for reelection, therefore ignoring his district. My, how things change.
THE DUNCE RATING
For skipping his duties to Congress and the American people while misleading his constituents, Kahele deserves:
That’s it for April. May is already off to a running start, so “Dunces” will be back in early June for the monthly recap in my search for unintelligent life in the political class.
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Cover photo: Madison Cawthorn speaks during former U.S. President Donald Trump's rally in Selma, N.C., on April 9, 2022. (Photo by Peter Zay/Anadolu Agency via Getty Images)